Mother’s Day just recently passed and something struck me after that day that I just can’t seem to shake.
You see, throughout the day on Mother’s Day I kept seeing messages; cards, social media posts, advertisements, all honoring mom’s for being strong.
That word jumped out at me every single time I read or heard it.
Are we essentially feeding the culture of never enough?
Are we endorsing the alpha female syndrome?
Why do women have to be strong to be honored?
Why do women need to be portrayed as strong?
Messages popped up everywhere, thanking mothers for being so strong, for everything that they do (because they do it all for the family), for keeping everything going, for running the show.
When we see messages like this, what does our subconscious brain do?
It connects “be strong, do it all” with “acknowledgement and reward.”
Let that sink in.
Portraying a message that women must be strong and do it all only validates the shame that comes along with such expectations.
Brenè Brown defines shame as “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”
Particularly for women, “shame is a web of unattainable expectations that say, Do it all, Do it perfectly, and Never let them see you struggle.”
As a society, we must do better than this.
We need to recognize women and mothers not as heroes who sacrifice it all, but as human beings with weaknesses and needs of their own.
We need to create a setting where they don’t have to do it all.
We need to make it known that it’s okay to need a break, to take time for themselves.
We need to value self-care and self-compassion.
So, for next Mother’s Day, tell your mom you love her for being her.
For all of her imperfections, all of her flaws, all of her.
Love her for her.
Better yet, tell her you love her for her now, and don’t wait until Mother’s Day to do so.
If you’re ready to release the alpha female routine and embrace peace and flow in your life, book a clarity call and let’s design your path forward.
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